The Scoop

By Dalton Del Don

That was one of the more pathetic displays of tackling by the Eagles I’ve seen in a long time. Normally I don’t question such things with pro athletes, but it sure seemed like Philadelphia checked out during that embarrassing loss Thursday…Pro Football Focus ranks Nnamdi Asomugha as the 100th cornerback this season, as in 99 are rated higher. He hasn’t exactly been an ideal fit in Philly…Marshawn Lynch has now scored in eight straight games and has eclipsed 100 rushing yards in four of his past five contests. His 15-yard TD run in the first quarter, when he looked stopped dead to rights, was especially impressive. For someone who apparently thrives in primetime, Lynch has another plus matchup at home against the Rams on Monday night.

The performance by these guys for this Indian talent show, which includes but not limited to eating fluorescent light bulbs and getting ran over by a car and a motorcycle at the same time, needs to be seen to be believed, but my favorite part is the terrified reaction by the female judge in this epic video.

With the score just 3-3 into the second quarter, those who had the Colts +21 points ATS had to feel pretty good. With the score 31-3 midway through the third quarter, Pats backers had to feel the same way, so it was a pretty crazy back-and-forth game, at least from a betting standpoint, especially considering the final score later became 31-24…Most of the scoring came in garbage time against a New England defense that has allowed the most fantasy points to opposing quarterbacks this season, but Dan Orlovsky appeared to be an upgrade over Curtis Painter. Sunday’s 24 points scored tied a season-high for the Colts…Selectively choosing, Pierre Garcon has totaled 421 receiving yards with six touchdowns over three games this season. In his other nine games, he’s totaled 384 yards with zero scores. He’s making Vincent Jackson blush when it comes to hit-or-miss wide receivers…BenJarvus Green-Ellis has three touchdowns over the past two games, but there’s no way he can be trusted in your fantasy playoffs. His usage is way too unpredictable, highlighted by getting just six carries at home against the Colts as 21-point favorites (and he didn’t see a single snap in the second half). I wouldn’t feel great starting him moving forward…Rob Gronkowski tied a single-season record by recording his 13th receiving touchdown as a tight end, and he would have broke it had his other one not later been ruled a rushing score. I can’t see him making it past the second round in fantasy drafts next year.

Not really sure what’s going on here, but let me introduce you to “dog disco.”

The Broncos/Vikings game was one of the best of the year, especially when you consider there were five scoring drives in the fourth quarter that resulted in a three-point win (at the buzzer) in a matchup that totaled 77 points…Percy Harvin in open space is deadly. Might want to defend the opposing team’s obvious best player with no Adrian Peterson, Denver…Speaking of the Broncos D, you certainly can’t credit this win to them, although a pick-six and a crucial interception late in the fourth certainly contributed. But Tim Tebow deserves a ton of credit. While he committed his first turnover in five games (a questionable fumble call), he got 13.5 YPA and threw a terrific pass to Demaryius Thomas facing a blitz late in the fourth quarter that could have been caught. Over the first three quarters of games this season, Tebow has got 5.0 YPA while producing six touchdowns. During fourth quarters, he’s got 9.5 YPA with seven total touchdowns…Why did the Vikings not let the Broncos score a touchdown with 1:12 left? Why was Denver attempting to score there?…Not only is Tebow 6-1 as a starter, but five of those victories have come on the road. As someone who put Denver in a parlay with Houston this week, all I can say is this; for once I was blind. Now I can see.

Peter Moylan gets burned by Nickelback.

I’m a fool and dropped C.J. Spiller in my home league earlier this year. Even if he’s not a special player, and the jury is still out, as plenty of running backs haven’t flourished until after they were considered busts in the past, the volume of touches he’s getting means he’s plenty relevant right now…Over his last four games, Chris Johnson has gained rushing yards in this sequence: 130, 13, 190, 153. It’s been a pretty crazy year for CJ, but I think it’s safe to say he’s officially back.

Meet the world’s heaviest insect, which weighs three times more than a mouse.

The Dolphins started the year 0-7, but let’s look a bit deeper. After two home games against the Patriots and Texans – teams fighting for the No. 1 seed in the AFC – they had three road tilts. After that, they lost by a field goal to the Broncos with Tim Tebow then playing (this appears to be only less damaging than a loss to the Packers) and again by a field goal in New York versus the Giants. Since then, they are 4-1, with the lone loss coming by one-point in Dallas while traveling during a short week by a field goal at the buzzer. They have allowed an average of 10.8 points over the past five games (including two garbage scores to Oakland with the game out of hand last week), and Matt Moore appears to be legit. This team is no joke…Rolando McClain’s pose here while getting arrested for fairly serious chargers is just such a Raiders thing to do.

Here’s a strong case for why we should abolish the penny entirely.

Nice to see Mike Shanahan stick to his word and feature Roy Helu extensively. In fact, no other Washington player saw a carry Sunday. Especially with his receiving ability, only health can prevent Helu from being a top-12 fantasy back down the stretch this year…Shonn Greene’s three touchdowns Sunday were more than he had previously scored in any season during his career…Tough break for Fred Davis owners.

This guy’s mugshot is fitting after trying to rob an MMA fighter.

T.J. Yates lost a fumble (that first appeared to be an incomplete pass) that would have been returned for a touchdown by Atlanta if not for oblivious coaches and players from the sidelines coming onto the field during the run back, resulting in a penalty. It was a truly bizarre play that most had given up on…I feel bad for Andre Johnson and his owners, as he once again appeared to be shot by a sniper Sunday. I guess it should be considered good news it’s his other hamstring this time…If Houston can somehow win in Cincinnati this week, they will be favorites in every other game the rest of the year, so they have a legit shot to be the No. 1 seed in the AFC, with Yates at QB (the first signal caller from UNC ever to start an NFL game). Crazy…Matt Ryan entered white hot, getting 8.5 YPA with a 9:2 TD:INT ratio over his past four games. He got 5.7 YPA with a 1:2 TD:INT ratio (and a 50.6 QB rating) Sunday, and Michael Turner was held to just 3.1 YPC. This Texans defense is the real deal. Especially without Mario Williams, Wade Phillips deserves a ton of credit. He’s one of many coaches who’s extremely valuable on one side of the ball yet have no business being in total control. Norv Turner won’t be a bad OC hire after he gets canned at the end of the year.

Crazy landing in extremely windy conditions.

After bragging about my parlay earlier, I’d be remiss not to talk about my teaser this week. I liked one team especially, but couldn’t find another. I finally settled on Pittsburgh, who ended up winning by 28 points. The team I was sure on all along? That would be the Bears. I’m not shocked or anything by their loss – few outcomes should do so for those who closely follow the NFL – but the cause being a Hail Mary was pretty frustrating, to say the least. I’m not complaining, but losing Matt Forte immediately and with a Robbie Gould short field goal miss combined with the Hail Mary at the end of the first half, let’s just say luck wasn’t exactly on my side…Speaking of Forte, what a brutal injury. He and Fred Jackson were two backs looking for big paydays having fantastic seasons only to go down later on. Pretty unfortunate…Taking away the Hail Mary, the Chiefs have scored one touchdown over their past 21 quarters.

If you’re missing a cat, here’s some hope it may have been found.

The Steelers scored 28 points in the second quarter. That’s a lot…Not sure what else I can say about A.J. Green at this point, but he’ll be a borderline top-five fantasy WR at draft tables next year, that much is clear…Mike Wallace, who normally relies on deep plays, scored two times Sunday while gaining just 38 receiving yards…Looking at their upcoming schedule, the only question with the Steelers is if they finish with 12 or 13 wins.

Pan for gold on the streets of New York City.

Cam Newton tied and later broke the NFL single-season record Sunday with 13 rushing touchdowns. He also recorded a 27-yard catch (that almost scored). Not bad for a rookie. I can’t emphasize how wrong I was about him. He’ll be a top-20 fantasy pick next year…Facing the team that had allowed the most fantasy points to opposing running backs, LeGarrette Blount had 11 carries for 19 yards. Ugh. The odds of Mossis Madu finishing with more yards had to have been pretty long.

Weatherman vowed to wear wife’s Colts panties if they lost to the Patriots.

The Ravens ran the ball 55 times. Just 28 passes total were completed in this game. That’s an oddity…The Browns have scored more than 20 points in just one game this season, and with three of their next four contests coming against the Ravens and Steelers (twice), they might finish the year with that distinction…Greg Little leads the NFL with 14 dropped passes this season.

An informative read about why NFL teams should throw deep more often.

What a terrific game between the Packers and Giants. With the ball at the 17-yard line, it made some sense New York called a run play before the two-minute warning, but only because they might have needed time should they not succeed on the two-point attempt. Still, it’s remarkable how 58 seconds was more than enough time for Aaron Rodgers to drive Green Bay down the field to get into easy FG territory…Can someone explain to me the difference between Greg Jennings’ touchdown catch and others that are called back for not “completing the process?”…After Hakeem Nicks beat him on an impressive, one-handed TD catch, even Charles Woodson had to give the WR props…During his coaching tenure with the Giants, Tom Coughlin is now 47-17 in the first half of seasons and 24-36 during the second half.

Here’s an extended trailer to the “Virgin Diaries” that’s every bit as cringe-worthy as expected.

I’m not sure how much there’s really a causal effect here, but the return of FB Tony Fiammetta certainly can’t hurt DeMarco Murray owners this week. Since starting, Murray has averaged 8.0 YPC with Fiammetta in the lineup and just 3.35 YPC with him out over the past three games…Kevin Kolb would be on pace to get sacked 58 times over a full season this year, and he’s committed more turnovers than touchdowns, but his 7.8 YPA at least makes him interesting moving forward…Jason Garrett deserves all the blame and then some for not only icing his own kicker, which was dumbfounding enough, but not using either of his two timeouts before that and settling for a 49-yard field goal was even worse. And here we thought those types of inept decisions left town when Wade Phillips did. Unbelievable. Even as someone who bet the Cardinals under and the Cowboys over before the season, I almost wanted to see Dallas lose for playing so stupid. Almost.

“Mashed potatoes” is Tiger’s new “Get in the hole!”

The Rams have allowed the fewest fantasy points to opposing tight ends this season, but Vernon Davis dropped a perfectly thrown pass from Alex Smith that would have been a 40-plus yard touchdown Sunday. It was brutal…The Rams never advanced the ball past San Francisco’s 35-yard line all game in Week 13. That’s not very good…Aldon Smith celebrating a sack like a boss…Frank Gore has been a solid fantasy performer this year, but he hasn’t scored since Week 8, and more disconcerting has been his difference in usage as a receiver. Before going down with a season-ending hip injury, Gore was on pace to finish last year with 74 catches for 723 receiving yards. He’s on pace to grab just 21 balls for 135 receiving yards in 2011.

This pig can walk on its front legs only, while this pig may soon need to learn how to.

Kevin Smith continues to frustrate, once again revealing upside by totaling 80 yards with a touchdown in essentially a half of work, only to leave after aggravating his ankle injury. He’s a highly risky fantasy start in Week 14, albeit one with upside if he’s active…Drew Brees has got 8.4 YPA with an 11:1 TD:INT ratio while taking just two sacks (for a loss of only four yards) over his past four games, three of which coming against potential playoff teams (ALT, NYG, DET). He has a ridiculous 20 touchdown passes over six homes games this year, which is a season’s pace of 53 scores…I can’t remember ever seeing a wide receiver get double teamed at the goal line like Calvin Johnson was Sunday night…Can someone explain to me why Detroit punted down 14 points with 6:38 left in the fourth quarter? It makes even less sense when you consider New Orleans is second in the NFL in scoring with 32.8 points per game.

FDA approves hangover pill.

Maurice Jones-Drew deserves a ton of credit, as he’s on pace to finish the season with 1,912 yards from scrimmage while playing on a team that has averaged just 12.7 points per game – the second fewest in the NFL. Not bad for someone who entered the year with a big question mark regarding the condition of his knee…According to Pro Football Focus, Philip Rivers leads all quarterbacks in the league with 33 balls “thrown away” this year. The next highest is Matthew Stafford with 22. Ben Roethlisberger has four all season long…While the Monday night matchup between teams with 4-7 and 3-8 records didn’t look good on paper, the outing likely decided a lot of fantasy contests entering the playoffs.

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